the new republic

claire and winnie got into a fight. now she has this.
the night before jse and i left for philadelphia, i walked out to feed the dogs. the dogs were very excited to eat, as most dogs are, and winnie took off in the direction of the food. claire didn't like this and ran after winnie trying to subdue her. in the past, winnie has always calmed down when claire gets into her face but since the other dogs have moved in, the chemistry has changed.

winnie growled back. then they started fighting. the other dogs were watching intently (given one vulnerable dog, the surrounding dogs will also attack, says jse). i couldn't do much, since my agility has been severely handicapped due to my pregnancy. several times, winnie had claire on her back by the throat; i really thought i was about to watch my own dog get killed. i did what i could and finally jeremy, who was inside watching fox news, heard and came out to separate them.

claire was covered in blood. at first she wouldn't even let me touch her, and then after a while i examined her and found a gaping wound larger than a half dollar on her shoulder. jeremy came in and produced a black box, twice the size of one used for fishing tackle, and opened it to reveal an assortment of syringes, tools and vials of medication. she was too small for cattle tranquilizer, so he told me to hold her down so he could clean the wound. i tried, but was so traumatized i couldn't stop shaking and was of no use.

finally, jeremy's dad came over and held her down while jeremy scrubbed and sutured the wound, i have never heard a dog scream like that. i was in my room in the fetal position trying to distract myself by watching rachel zoe on youtube.

it was really terrible but i guess no matter how many human characteristics we assign to dogs, they're still dogs and are actually not human or human-like at all.

"do i really look like i could piss off another dog?" (the answer is yes, absolutely, most definitely)
i waited until now to post because the pictures were pretty gnarly and i like to keep this blog family-friendly.

hap hazard

today i had to park much farther away than my usual spot behind the shop. in the middle of the day, someone called and needed some information that was in a document i had left in the car. i promised to call back in three minutes. then i realized i was parked far away. i tried running, except that i was extremely slow and out of breath after about eight seconds. i kept going. then i caught my reflection in a window, and realized that i was running slower than many people walk and also that i looked like a hazard waiting to happen. so i slowed down. at least i got in a work out today.

lucky number 33

this morning, i put on my favorite camisole that i've enjoyed throughout my whole pregnancy only to discover that it now fits like a wet suit. i guess it's about that time where i transition from "oh, look at that cute pregnant belly" to "whoa that girl looks like she's about to pop". at the shop this morning i even got a few raised eyebrows.

that was the backyard...

...and today in the front yard, this...

business as usual

i looked out my kitchen window on friday and saw this.
in addition to this giant animal standing around in the driveway, muneca kept trying to herd it by running circles around it and nipping at his knees, but really the horse had been standing still for ten minutes. and then there's winnie in the background, whose self affliction and low self esteem are pervasive even into her private activities. the best is that my little peanut nephew tried to touch the horse, chicken pox has made him brave.

32 weeks

my butt is disappearing. the growth of my backfat and love handles is outpacing the growth of my butt. the shift in silhouette is alarming, but not unexpected.

locked and loaded

lately jeremy has been reading an apocalyptic novel about the imminent economic collapse of america. because he is a touch passionate about such things, he's decided that i need to go to a two day workshop to learn how to survive in anarchy/the woods/chaos. this is how he looked when i got home (the topsiders and plaid shorts make the guns look less scary). i haven't agreed to it, but am curious as to the types of people who attend "survival school".

happy birthday, chubbs

you've grown so much in a year..
..and your prosthetic arm gets cuter every time i see you..

making the most of it

nephew's head has gone from the 20th percentile to the 15th. we were talking about how small that makes his nose. his nose is definitely small for his face, so if his head is in the 15th percentile, his nose must be in the .001 percentile. can you imagine if his head was in the 90th percentile and his nose really was still that little? that would be hard on his social life. he is perfect the way he is, but if you put nerds up his nose he would suffocate.

the word on the street

i hear that this is going to happen to me soon, sad. i hope the person isn't smiling like this or wearing a shoulder length plastic pink glove.

if only

right now, the only way i can get a deep breath is if i yawn. it's become a major impediment today because i can't breathe while i'm explaining things to customers. and then i yawn and it sends the wrong message.

also i realized that in the hierarchy of people who get special treatment, elderly men still outweigh pregnant women. today i was going into a restaurant to get my lunch and an 80 something year old man and i stood at the door, he was on the inside, i was on the outside, and it was a test of will. i lost and opened the door for him. he didn't say thank you, he may have even tried to trip me.

yesterday the only thing i wanted in the world was to have a summer like baby in dirty dancing. high waisted bermuda denim shorts, eyelet tops, printed cardigans, keds without socks. volleyball on the lawn, talent show, the whole thing.


and then i realized, oh yes, i am shaped more like an eggplant than a human right now and jeremy does not like jazz shoes or feathered hair. now that that episode is behind me, i have become more realistic and just want a summer free of rashes and cankles.