your mom is so skinny, she could use a dorito as a hand glider

it's very gross to watch people eat. you see food go into someone's mouth, watch them chew until it's the consistency of oatmeal and then watch the muscles of the esophagus squeeze it down toward the stomach like a girl trying to fit into her skinny jeans. the scariest part is that at first you see the food, and then it just keeps disappearing. the food you just saw consumed will never be seen again. for some reason, if i'm eating too, i don't feel grossed out, maybe because i am occupied. watching fat, bald men eat is the worst.